When choosing a monument for your loved one, there are plenty of decisions to make. You want to choose something that will stand the test of time and reflect the life of the person you lost.
The memorial you choose will likely be a part of your family’s history for generations. You want to be sure it is something that will honor the life and personality of the person who has passed on, as well as their place in your family.
The following guide offers tips for choosing the perfect memorial for the departed.
Types Of Memorials
When it comes to choosing a memorial, there are many different options available. It can be overwhelming to make these decisions when you are grieving the loss of someone close.
With a little research and planning, you can find the perfect memorial for the departed. Here are some of the different types of memorials available.
1. Cremation Memorials
Cremation memorials are an excellent choice for many families. They are often more affordable than other types and provide an elegant way to remember your friend or family member without worrying about upkeep or maintenance.
Some people choose cremation because they want to keep their loved ones’ ashes close by to scatter them at a later date; others choose it because they donโt have room for traditional burial plots in their cemeteries.
Cremation memorials can be made of many different materials, including granite and bronze, which means that you have plenty of options when it comes time to designing one.
CREMATION URNS
Cremation urns are vessels that hold the ashes of a person after cremation. They can be placed in a memorial garden or buried โ some families like to keep them on display inside their homes.
Flickr Image by Martin Lopatka
Cremation urns come in various shapes and sizes and can be personalized with engravings or designs.
Cremation memorials are an excellent way to honor someone who has died. If you have questions about how to design one or where to purchase one, talk to a professional at your local cemetery or funeral home.
CREMATION PLAQUES
A cremation plaque is a small memorial you can display in your home or garden. They are often made of metal and feature an engraving with the deceased person’s name, birth date, and death date.
You can also add a quote from them, a personalized message, or an art design they love. Some families choose to hang these plaques in a prominent place like above the fireplace or on an entryway table, so everyone who walks into the house can pay their respects.
CREMATION JEWELRY
More and more people are turning to jewelry as a way of keeping the memory of lost loved ones close by having their ashes added to items they once owned.
For some, the act of holding onto a memento can bring them closer to the spirit of a loved one and help them cope with loss.
Memorial jewelry can be engraved with words or images that mean a lot to your family members, and the ashes are deposited using glass or resin.
2. Grave Markers
Graves are a place of remembrance and reflection. A grave marker is a permanent tribute to your loved one and will serve as the centerpiece for their final resting place.
Headstones can be engraved with the name of your loved one, date of birth and death, dates they served in the military, or any other information you want to share with others.
The gravestone design is customizable, and you can add a small photo of your loved one, their favorite art piece, or a favorite saying.
Gravestone Designs
- Upright headstones: This type of memorial stone is fairly traditional โ it can be made in a variety of sizes and finishes, and it’s typically affixed to the ground with a concrete base.
- Flat headstones: A flat headstone is a more contemporary option, and it can be engraved with just about anything. There are many different styles of flat gravestones โsome are rectangular, some have rounded edges and corners, and others have rounded tops.
- Kerbed headstones: This upright memorial stone is carved with a groove or channel around the edge. The groove is designed to hold flowers, plants, or other decorations.
3. Memorial Statues
A memorial statue is a beautiful addition to your loved one’s final resting place. Memorial statues can range from simple figurines to larger, more complex works of art depicting people or animals.
Choosing A Memorial Statue
When choosing a memorial statue, keep in mind the size of your loved one’s final resting place. It’s essential to consider how much space you have available and what type of statue would fit best with the other memorials in the cemetery.
If you’re unsure which style or design would be most appropriate for your loved one’s final resting place, talk with a funeral director or cemetery representative about which options are available at local cemeteries.
Personalizing a Memorial Statue
You may also want to consider how your loved one would have liked to be remembered. A garden-style memorial statue may be appropriate if they were outdoorsy and enjoyed the great outdoors.
If they were an animal lover, perhaps you’d like something that depicts a dog or cat in their likeness.
4. Memorial Benches
Memorial benches are a great way to remember people who have passed. They can reassure a grieving person that they are giving something back to the community โ because they know their bench will be used and appreciated by many people.
Choosing a Place for the Memorial Bench
When deciding where to put the bench, many people choose a public location with sentimental value โ perhaps a local park or beach.
You can also choose a more private location. This might be somewhere that is special to the person you’re remembering, such as their home or workplace.
If you want to place it in a public place, it’s crucial to check with local authorities first to make sure they don’t have any restrictions.
Choosing The Style
Once you’ve decided on a location, you will need to determine what type of bench would be most appropriate. You can choose between storing the ashes inside one or simply memorialize a standard bench by engraving it.
A specialized business may help you if you’re unsure which type of bench would be best. To choose a bench to commemorate your loved one, you’ll need to consider material, finish, and personalization.
Personalizing
Memorial benches can include the individual’s name, birth date, and death date. Many cemeteries offer engraving services that allow you to personalize a bench with special messages about your loved one.
Some popular examples include:
- Fond memories of
- In remembrance of
- Never forgotten
You could also include a line or two from their favorite poem, song, or hymn. If you have a special saying or motto that has special meaning for your family, this is another option to include on the memorial bench.
If you choose to engrave a line from scripture, be sure it is appropriate for all ages. Some cemeteries will not allow religious symbols or messages on benches if they are located in public places like parks.
5. Memorial Trees
A memorial tree is an environmentally-friendly and peaceful way to pay tribute to or remember someone you love.
A memorial tree is a lasting symbol of life planted in remembrance of the deceased, giving family and friends a place to visit and feel close to them.
People often scatter ashes at the site of a tree’s planting or bury them during planting, marking the memorial.
Choosing A Memorial Tree
When choosing a memorial tree, consider the species and location. The right tree is beautiful and well-suited to your loved one’s personality.
For example, if your loved one was fond of animals, consider planting a tree that attracts wildlife or birds. If they loved color and beauty, consider using a colorful flower tree or shrub.
Personalizing A Memorial Tree
To personalize a memorial tree, consider putting something about your loved one on it. This can be done with a plaque or engraving.
The plaque can be engraved with a special message, and you can choose to place it on the tree or the grave. For an animal lover, consider putting up a birdhouse or squirrel house in their honor.
Planting The Memorial Tree
To plant a memorial tree, you will need permission from the landowner. This may be an individual, a corporation or company, or a local council.
Once you have permission, choose a location. It is best to plant your memorial tree in an area that will not be disturbed in the future and where it will receive plenty of sunshine.
You can also plant the tree on a particular day, such as your loved one’s birthday.
6. Memorial Mausoleums
Mausoleums are an option for people who wish to be buried above ground and provide a place of quiet reflection for family members.
Advantages
- Cleaner and drier than an exposed grave, a hidden crypt or chamber offers excellent protection for the dead.
- Ideal for those who prefer not to be buried in the ground.
- Indoor mausoleums are more accessible to visit than the traditional variety.
Before choosing an underground burial for your loved one, it’s wise to talk with family and friends. If the deceased showed a disliking towards being underground during their lifetime, it’s probably best to honor that wish.
Personalizing A Mausoleum
Mausoleums are often the perfect place to personalize a final resting place. People often take pride in their skills to make the final resting place of their loved one a lasting tribute.
Before finalizing its sketch, you can ask the architect to include dedicated places for your loved one’s memorabilia, such as photographs or jewelry.
You can also add special features, such as an inscription on the floor commemorating their life or a stained-glass window representing an aspect of their personality.
You can also personalize the design of your loved one’s final resting place by adding a unique feature. For example, you could add an organ or piano if they were a musician. If they were an avid gardener or farmer, consider adding some plants.
The Dos And Don’ts Of Cemetery Monuments
Cemeteries often allow families to add personal touches, such as flowers and mementos, to their loved one’s grave sites.
However, some cemeteries enforce strict regulations on the type or style of decorations permitted.
So, to help you avoid the common pitfalls of cemetery decoration, we’ve created this guide.
Permitted Decorations
Before erecting a monument on your loved one’s grave, check with the cemetery to ensure they allow it. If they do, you can also add other decorations, such as flowers and photographs.
However, certain items may not be permitted. For instance, some cemeteries restrict the size and number of stones used to create a memorial stone wall around the grave area.
Ask Permission For Special Requests
If you want to add a special request to your loved one’s headstone, ask the cemetery first. This includes requests like adding religious symbols or writing poetry on the stone.
Check In With Your Local Council
If you’re erecting a monument on public grounds or a town cemetery, you’ll need to check with the local council first. They may have rules about how high you can build your monument and what materials are allowed.
Check with your state if your local council has no rules about monuments. Some states require that you get a permit before building a monument, while others don’t.
Final Thoughts
When designing a space for your loved one’s final resting place, you can be as creative as you want. The possibilities are endless, and there are no rules to do things a certain way.
The best thing to do is talk to a professional about the design and features for headstones, monuments, and graves. They will help you honor the legacy, personality, and passions of the dearly departed.