After losing a loved one, you may experience physical symptoms of grief as well as emotional ones. Intense grief can take on many forms. It may be so severe that you feel physical pain. Some people say they feel grief in their chest – as though they literally have a broken heart.
This article will examine what happens during the grieving process. It will explore how grief can affect physical, emotional, and mental health and provide guidance on dealing with the physical effects of grief.
What Happens When We Grieve?
Every person experiences grief differently. For some people, it’s a purely emotional experience, and the sad feelings begin to fade over time. Others who have difficulty accepting the loss may start to experience complicated grief, leading to mental health problems. Many also struggle with the physical effects.
Emotional Stress Experienced in Grief
Most of us don’t even think of the physical symptoms of grief after the loss of a significant person. Instead, we associate grief with emotional pain like feelings of sadness, anger, depression, guilt, fear, and intense stress.
The grieving process can feel like an emotional roller coaster with so many bumps and turns that you’re unsure what feeling you’ll experience next. The emotional pain eventually begins to fade for some people, but others experience complicated grief and need professional help.
Yes, the emotional discomfort of grief is intense! But did you know that grief can also affect our physical wellbeing? Let’s look at the different ways grief affects us.
How Grief Can Affect Mental Health
Did you know that mental health conditions are common with grief? Sometimes grieving can take its toll on a person’s mental health, and they require professional intervention. Here are some of the mental health conditions commonly associated with grief:
Complicated Grief
This type of deep grief lingers and affects the person’s ability to function in daily life. Someone experiencing normal grief generally requires a support structure, and the intense grief will eventually fade. Complicated grief does not go away, and the person will need professional help.
Depression
Depression is characterized by extreme hopelessness, mental and physical sluggishness, loss of appetite, persistent feelings of worthlessness, feeling exhausted, and more. While depression is a normal part of the grieving process, it should eventually ease. If not, the person needs help from a professional.
Anxiety and Panic Attacks
An anxiety attack can be so intense that it feels like a heart attack. This can also be a normal part of grief, but it’s essential to seek help if the feelings of anxiety and panic continue. People with anxiety caused by grief may have a higher risk of heart disease.
Nightmares
It is common to experience nightmares with normal grief. If it continues for a long time, increases in frequency or intensity, or the person begins to experience night terrors; it’s a sign that it’s not a normal part of grief.
If you or a family member or friend are experiencing these mental conditions during the grieving process, see a doctor or other professional as soon as possible. They will help you get back on track with a normal grief process.
Many treatment facilities can help people who struggle with complicated grief or other mental illness caused by bereavement.
The Physical Effects of Grief
People are more likely to experience physical problems during the first four to six months after the death of a family member or friend. Men and older people are at greater risk of struggling with health problems because of grief.
The physical effects can range from mild to extreme and can resolve relatively quickly or remain for years. Some people experience symptoms similar to anxiety, like shortness of breath, weight loss, and trouble with sleep. Other bereaved people may experience lowered immunity, joint pain, increased blood pressure, or even life-threatening health issues like heart attacks.
If you or a family member or a friend are struggling with losing a loved one, it’s essential to know that you are not alone. Experiencing grief is something almost every person has to deal with.
If the grieving person is at risk of serious health problems because of grief, they may require professional intervention. In the next section, we’ll look at some of the symptoms to keep an eye out for.
Watch Out For These Physical Symptoms of Grief
If you know the symptoms to look for when you, or someone close to you, is going through the emotional pain of a death, it could help you to know how to deal with the physical effects of grief, for example:
- Extreme fatigue and loss of energy
- Headaches, general aches, and other pains
- Brain fog and memory loss
- Digestive issues like stomach pain, weight loss or gain, nausea, and vomiting
- A weakened immune system
- Insomnia and oversleeping
- Shortness of breath and chest pain
- Dry mouth and dehydration
Acute stress due to grief can also cause uncommon symptoms like hair loss and fainting. As you can see from the vast and varied physical symptoms you may experience with grief, it can be serious, and it is often overlooked.
Many people focus on their mental and emotional stress when losing a loved one and completely disregard how their bodies are also dealing with the grief. There is no way of predicting how bereaved people will respond to the loss, physically, mentally, or emotionally.
Deep grief can lead to an increased risk of health problems like physical pain, trouble sleeping, high blood pressure, joint pain, and a weakened immune symptom. It can cause symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome, and, in already unhealthy bereaved people, it can even lead to heart disease and cause a heart attack.
Let’s delve deeper into what happens when we experience physical symptoms of grieving.
Extreme Fatigue and Loss of Energy
When your body releases stress hormones, all your internal resources kick into gear as they try to repair and restore functionality. This overworks the system and can leave you feeling exhausted. It’s also common to experience a feeling of heaviness after the death of a loved one.
Advice:
Rest. During grief, our bodies need to rest, and the fatigue and lack of energy are signals. A grieving person needs to know that it will take time for their energy levels to return to normal. It’s okay to rest as much as you need to.
Headaches, Body Aches, and Other Pains
Grief can cause extreme discomfort in our bodies like headaches, overall muscular pain, and joint aches. The stress caused by grief can also cause existing physical problems like arthritis to flare up, especially in older adults.
As the reaction to death intensifies, so do general aches and pains. Crying makes it worse – although it is a normal reaction to grief, it can intensify the pains.
Advice:
Painkillers and cold compresses can help you deal with this in the short term. However, it’s important not to numb out the symptoms of grief with medication. Doing gentle stretches can help ease physical discomfort.
Brain Fog and Memory Loss
Losing a family member or friend affects every part of the body, even the brain. It could leave you feeling confused, forgetful, and out of touch with your surroundings and your own body. You may struggle to concentrate and only focus on thoughts and feelings about your lost loved one.
Advice:
If you or someone you care for is grieving and find it difficult to cope with brain fog and forgetfulness, try using to-do lists, calendar reminders, schedules, and phone alerts to help keep you on track. Over time, as the grief subsides, the fog should also begin to dissipate.
Digestive Issues
We carry a lot of tension in our stomach, leading to digestive issues like stomach pain, weight loss or gain, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea.
Some people don’t feel hungry and will begin to experience weight loss. Others turn to comfort eating and could gain weight. Grief could drastically elevate your symptoms if you have irritable bowel syndrome, Crohn’s, or coeliac disease.
Advice:
Even if you don’t have an appetite, grief can weaken the immune system, so you will need all the essential nutrients the body requires. Try to eat regular meals so your body has the fuel to deal with the grief. To avoid additional pressure on the digestive system, avoid exotic, spicy, and acidic foods that may aggravate it. Stick to nutrient-dense and simple foods.
If you’re not able to maintain a healthy diet, talk to a friend or call your doctor to get the support you need. Remember, a lack of nutrition can cause health problems, so it’s vital to deal with this as soon as possible.
A Weakened Immune System
When your body goes through the grieving process, it takes its toll on every system. It pumps stress hormones around and operates on overdrive. This makes you more susceptible to disease and other health issues. You may experience a heightened inflammatory response and could be more prone to viruses.
Weakened immunity is one of the most serious physical effects of grief. It makes you more susceptible to illness, which makes coping with the intense stress of the loss even more challenging. The more emotional stress you experience, the more your immunity is affected. It’s a vicious circle!
Advice:
Try to avoid lowering immunity too much. Before struggling with inflammatory responses and other health issues associated with weakened immunity, ensure you keep up with a healthy lifestyle, including proper nutrition, regular exercise, and enough sleep.
It’s also important to do your best to wash your hands regularly and keep your distance from sick people while you are struggling with emotional stress, and your immunity may be compromised.
Insomnia and Oversleeping
The emotional stress of grief can keep you up night after night. Restlessness and ruminating thoughts can accompany grief and cause insomnia. On the other hand, emotional stress can also cause extreme fatigue. You may oversleep but wake up feeling like you need more sleep.
Advice:
Vitamin D helps regulate your circadian rhythm, which promotes regular sleep patterns. Make sure you get outside during the day for some much-needed sunshine. Vitamin D also has many other health benefits.
If you’re struggling to fall asleep because of intrusive thoughts, try to listen to relaxing music or a guided meditation. Restful sleep is essential for the healing process.
Shortness of Breath and Chest Pain
Feeling as though you have a broken heart is real. Studies have shown that the extreme tension felt after losing a loved one can cause changes in the heart muscle cells or the coronary blood vessels.
This change can prevent the left ventricle from contracting correctly and cause broken-heart syndrome. The technical term for this condition is stress-induced cardiomyopathy, and the symptoms are similar to heart attacks and include shortness of breath and chest pain.
Other research has shown that grief can cause acute myocardial infarction.
Advice:
If you are grieving and begin to experience shortness of breath or pains in your chest, get professional help immediately. It may not be a heart attack, but it’s best to make sure. Those grieving are at greater risk of heart health problems.
Tell your doctor that you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one, and you want to ensure your heart is okay.
Dry Mouth and Dehydration
When you spend a lot of time crying, and your body is still in shock from the emotional pain you’re experiencing, you may experience dry mouth and dehydration. During emotional stress, your body will need extra liquid to maintain balance.
Advice:
Carry a water bottle with you and take sips, even when you don’t feel thirsty. Try to stay away from coffee and other caffeinated drinks and soda.
10 Methods of Dealing With the Physical Symptoms of Grief
From broken heart syndrome to mild heart attacks and problems with immunity, the health problems associated with grief are real and can seriously affect one’s life. It’s essential to learn how to deal with grief in a healthy way.
Tackle Grief a Day at a Time
Commit to making small improvements every day to gradually heal from the physical effects of grieving as you put your broken heart together again. Remember, the loved one you’ve lost would want you to be happy and would not want you to suffer. Even if you have difficulty accepting the loss, time will ease the effects.
Until you begin to find the relief that time brings, you can try some of these tips to help alleviate the physical symptoms of grief:
#1. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is known for its ability to reduce stress. It helps you recognize the physical aspects of grief you’re experiencing and understand how it impacts your body and mind.
There are several free online resources you can use to learn how mindfulness works and how to practice it. It will help you become aware of your breathing and the present moment, making it easier to manage emotions and regulate stress hormones. Practicing mindfulness can drastically alleviate the physical symptoms of grief.
#2. Get Enough Quality Rest
Allow yourself to rest when you need to. If you need a nap during the day, take one, and don’t feel guilty about it. Try to go to sleep at around the same time every night and aim for eight hours.
If you struggle to fall asleep, try a guided meditation to become more restful, and use a few drops of lavender oil in your bath and on your pillow. Ensure you get at least 15 minutes of sunlight every day and don’t use electronics before bedtime.
#3. Eat Regular, Nutritious Meals
Try to eat three nutrient-dense meals every day. Ensure that each meal contains enough calories, protein, and healthy fats. If possible, eat vegetables with every meal and make sure you get enough fiber in. Fresh vegetable and fruit salads are perfect meals because they provide energy and nutrition and help maintain a healthy digestive system.
Don’t forget to drink enough water and try to stay away from too many caffeinated and alcoholic drinks.
#4. Exercise Regularly
For optimal health, 30 minutes of exercise every day is ideal. If you don’t feel up to this, it’s okay, do what you can. Gently push yourself to move more regularly, even if you start with a five-minute walk outside every day or do a few stretches in bed when you wake up in the morning. The idea is to do something to move your body and get your blood flowing.
Over time, take longer walks or add some movements to get your heart rate up. If you enjoy yoga or pilates, take a class or try an instructional video online if you’re not up to a crowd. The more you move, the more your body will respond favorably, and your mood will lift, even if it’s just a little bit.
#5. Spend Time in Nature
Nature rejuvenates the mind, body, and soul in so many ways. If your preferred exercise is walking, try doing it outdoors. Visit parks nearby or enjoy the trees and fresh air outside wherever you walk.
You could also spend time outside lying down on the grass and enjoying the sunlight as you take in the smells, sights, and sounds. This also happens to be an excellent mindfulness exercise.
#6. Consider Socializing
It may feel weird at first to get back to socializing, especially if you’re still struggling with a broken heart and physical symptoms of grief. It could be worth it, though. The happy hormones of being around people you care about will help you heal quicker.
If you are up to it, start slowly by meeting a family member or friend for a walk in the park or a coffee date. Once you see how the first social interaction makes you feel, you’ll know what to do to plan the next one.
#7. Try an Old Hobby or Activity
Having fun may sound impossible to you when you are feeling exhausted, sad, and filled with heartache. Eventually, you will start living your life again and get back to old hobbies and activities you enjoyed.
Perhaps you can start with something that will honor your loved one’s life? For example, if you enjoy baking and have lost someone to cancer, bake something to donate to a cancer charity. Add it to your schedule when you’re ready to try some hobbies or activities. The hardest part will be sticking to it, but after the first time, it will become easier.
#8. Cultivate Healthy Coping Mechanisms
Unhealthy coping mechanisms like cigarettes, impulse shopping, gambling, and alcohol may be attractive because it helps numb the sad emotions you are experiencing. Instead, acknowledge that you are experiencing emotional distress and accept that it will take time to heal.
Take care of yourself physically and mentally by exercising, getting enough sleep, and looking after your nutritional needs. Find support from loved ones or professionals. For your long-term recovery, it’s best to avoid unhealthy coping mechanisms and stick to healthy habits instead.
#9. Join a Support Group
Support groups are invaluable during times of emotional distress. It allows you to spend time with other people going through something similar to you. The shared grief creates an atmosphere of understanding and a safe space to express how you feel.
Support groups can help you feel less alone during this difficult time in your life and make the healing process go significantly faster. It’s straightforward to search online for local support groups in your area.
Some areas even have focused groups, so you may find a support group specifically for your needs, for example, a group for those who have lost a spouse or a child.
#10. Get Help From a Professional
If you have tried some of the methods above and still struggle, it may be time to talk to a professional. Get in touch with a grief counselor or therapist specializing in grief therapy. They are trained to help you navigate the complexity of the grief process and the feelings and physical symptoms you are experiencing.
Remember, dealing with your loss head-on will help your healing process to move quicker and help prevent you from slipping into complicated grief. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and support.
Conclusion
Experiencing grief can be emotional, mental, or physical. When we experience the emotional shock of losing a loved one, our bodies release stress hormones into the bloodstream. We begin to experience great physical discomfort as we go into shock.
The intensity and duration of the physical aspects of grief will depend on how the body responds to the hormones and could surface as physical symptoms. The physical effects of grief can make it challenging to stay healthy, and some people eventually require professional intervention.
There are many ways to deal with these physical symptoms, and every person will tackle them differently. There are temporary fixes that help mask the intense feelings, but true healing only happens with time and care. The best way to get through the time it will take is to focus on what you can control on that particular day. Don’t forget time and gentle care heals.